I don’t think anyone would disagree with me when I say 2020 was a wild year. Most of us are likely glad that it is over. Every new year, thousands of people reflect on their habits and create goals for the new year. According to psychologist Joseph Luciani, about 80% of people who make new year’s resolutions give up on them by mid-February. So how can we actually ensure that our new habit goals will stick around? Over the past few years, I’ve come across a lot of good advice in books, podcasts, documentaries, and so on. Here I will list my major takeaways that I will be attempting on my own goals.
- Start Small
Perhaps the best thing you can do to introduce a new habit is to break it down into the smallest chunks possible. One thing I absolutely hate doing and therefore procrastinate on very often is laundry, particularly folding and putting my clothes away. For some reason the task seems so daunting to me, especially as the pile continues to grow. The bigger the pile gets, the more anxiety I have about it. While discussing this with my executive functioning coach, she asked me if I can’t put all my clothes away right now, could I maybe just work on it for one minute? Or even 30 seconds? Could I put just my sweaters away or just my socks? When thinking this way, the answer should be “of course I can!”
- Stay Positive
It may sound cliche, but it is imperative to maintain a positive mindset if you plan on sticking with something. Our minds greatly impact our bodies. So if you say, for example, that you want to go vegan, but you focus on all the things you are eliminating from your diet, I guarantee that you will give up. Focusing on elimination is inherently negative. You’re thinking of all the delicious brownies and ice cream that you’re giving up. In a more positive spin, you could focus on what you are adding to your diet. There are so many interesting and delicious vegan recipes out there. And those who go vegan typically introduce a whole slew of foods into their diets that they haven’t tried before. How exciting is that?! Positivity will feed your motivation to reach your goals. Without this motivation, you won’t get far. So find what it is that drew you to that goal in the first place and really focus on all the positives that will come from it.
- Seek Out Short-Term Gratification
Similarly to the previous point about positivity, it is important that you actually enjoy what you’re doing. Even if you don’t think you would enjoy, let’s say, working out, there are some tricks here. Your real motivation for wanting to exercise more may be to lose weight or be healthier, but according to Michelle Segar, a sport and health psychologist at the University of Michigan, the best motivators are the many benefits that you experience immediately while working out. It is important to focus on how good it makes you feel, that boost of energy you get, that sense of accomplishment, and so on. So whatever your goal, instead of focusing on where you want to be a year from now, think about the short-term gratification that you can get from these habits and let those be your driving motivators.
- Incorporate Into Existing Routines
I first heard this suggestion from BJ Fogg, the author of the book Tiny Habits, on an episode of the Life Kit podcast by NPR. Fogg says that one part of his 3-step method to tiny habits is to find where it fits in your routine. Instead of trying to change your routine in order to fit in a new habit, work within your existing routine and incorporate this practice where it makes sense. As Fogg suggests in the podcast, if your goal is to read more, take out a book and read a paragraph when you sit down on the subway in the morning. While working with my physical therapist, I remember having a conversation on my water intake, which is notoriously low. She had suggested finding a time in my day where I have an established routine and squeeze in 30 seconds to fill my water bottle. This way if my water bottle is empty by the end of the day, I know I drank the amount that I needed. After I wake up in the morning, I go to the bathroom, brush my teeth, and wash my face, then I go downstairs to make a cup of coffee and grab some breakfast before starting my day. I decided that while I’m making coffee, I can fill up my water bottle too. Now several months later, it is an automatic part of my morning routine.
- Just Do It
“Just do it! Don’t let your dreams be dreams.” Throwback to 2015 Shia Labeouf. But actually, he has a point here! As my executive functioning coach put it, action comes before motivation. That’s why you need to “just do it.” While this may sound easier said than done, there are smart ways to give yourself that push. One of which is what was previously listed, breaking things into smaller chunks. If you take a big task and split it into small steps, it feels much easier to start and the anxiety that was keeping you from taking that first step dissipates. And the trick to this method is again that action comes before motivation. So when I tell myself to just spend one minute on something, I am highly likely to actually do more than that.
A reason I realized for my procrastination is that I’m “too busy” or “too focused” on something else. I know I need to drink more water, but I get so caught up in work or whatever else I’m doing that I tend to forget. Then at the end of the day, I look at my water bottle and realize I did not meet my water intake goal for the day. So I started using an app to periodically remind me to drink water. While I definitely will not always have the time to drink a full glass of water after every reminder, I can certainly take a sip. Taking one sip of water isn’t going to distract me too much from what I was doing, but that little ding from my phone that says “water reminder” is enough of a distraction to momentarily take me away from what I was doing and take a sip.
I hope you find these tips helpful for you. I will be working hard to implement these as I work on my new year’s resolutions too!
